I’ve Wasted Half My Life on the Internet: YTMND.

I’ve come to an epiphany, my life has clearly reached a turning point where I must wisely choose my path. After plugging the numbers into Wolfram Alpha, I have determined that I’ve clocked half of my life into the internet. While the effects of staring at a monitor for such an extended period of time have yet to be determined, I can say with absolute certainty that…

serious business cat

  • The only reason people call me is to fix their computer.
  • I maybe leave the house twice a year.
  • I’m “slightly” overweight.
  • My only girlfriend left me after two weeks.
  • I like this video way too much.

That’s settled then. Clearly, I’ve wasted the prime of my life. I should immediately start recanting my mistakes by finally going outside and saying hello to the world.

*LOUD KNOCKING ON THE DOOR TO MY BASEMENT…*
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